A Geeks’ Christmas Carol

 

On the first day of Christmas

My DBA gave to me

A tuning tweak for my b-tree

~

On the second day of Christmas

My DBA gave to me

Two reorg jobs,

And a tuning tweak for my b-tree

~

On the third day of Christmas

My DBA gave to me

Three DB trends

Two reorg jobs,

And a tuning tweak for my b-tree

~

On the fourth day of Christmas

My DBA gave to me

Four IT nerds,

Three DB trends,

Two reorg jobs,

And a tuning tweak for my b-tree

~

On the fifth day of Christmas

My DBA gave to me

Five truncated strings,

Four IT nerds,

Three DB trends

Two reorg jobs,

And a tuning tweak for my b-tree

~

On the sixth day of Christmas

My DBA gave to me

Six hairs a-greying,

Five truncated strings,

Four IT nerds,

Three DB trends

Two reorg jobs,

And a tuning tweak for my b-tree

~

On the seventh day of Christmas

My DBA gave to me

Seven bosses nagging,

Six hairs a-greying,

Five truncated strings,

Four IT nerds,

Three DB trends

Two reorg jobs,

And a tuning tweak for my b-tree

~

On the eighth day of Christmas

My DBA gave to me

Eight logs for pruning,

Seven bosses nagging,

Six hairs a-greying,

Five truncated strings,

Four IT nerds,

Three DB trends

Two reorg jobs,

And a tuning tweak for my b-tree

~

On the ninth day of Christmas

My DBA gave to me

Nine buffers flushing,

Eight logs for pruning,

Seven bosses nagging,

Six hairs a-greying,

Five truncated strings,

Four IT nerds,

Three DB trends

Two reorg jobs,

And a tuning tweak for my b-tree

 

~

On the tenth day of Christmas

My DBA gave to me

Ten thresholds tripping,

Nine buffers flushing,

Eight logs for pruning,

Seven bosses nagging,

Six hairs a-greying,

Five truncated strings,

Four IT nerds,

Three DB trends

Two reorg jobs,

And a tuning tweak for my b-tree

~

On the eleventh day of Christmas

My DBA gave to me

Eleven Devs a-griping,

Ten thresholds tripping,

Nine buffers flushing,

Eight logs for pruning,

Seven bosses nagging,

Six hairs a-greying,

Five truncated strings,

Four IT nerds,

Three DB trends

Two reorg jobs,

And a tuning tweak for my b-tree

~

On the twelfth day of Christmas

My DBA gave to me

Twelve tables truncating,

Eleven Devs a-griping,

Ten thresholds tripping,

Nine buffers flushing,

Eight logs for pruning,

Seven bosses nagging,

Six hairs a-greying,

Five truncated strings,

Four IT nerds,

Three DB trends

Two reorg jobs,

And a tuning tweak for my b-tree

 

 

MERRY CHRISTMAS!